Thursday, December 12, 2013

How To Use a Douche

(Excerpt) Using a douche can be scary & potentially dangerous, so it's important that you know how to use one correctly before you attempt to insert it into your egg hole. A douche is a device used to introduce a stream of water into the body for medical or hygienic reasons. Doctors highly recommended that you use a douche no more than once a month, as it can potentially unbalance your egg hole & cause your yolk to taste like an egg salad sandwich. Goodluck.

Tuesday, December 10, 2013

10 Most Disturbing Pokemon

'If it ain't broke, don't fix it'; a sentiment that no video game franchise embodies as succinctly as Pokemon. That shouldn't be taken as an insult, since even the people developing the series maintain that like any lasting sport or game, Pokemon doesn't need to change to stay relevant.

Instead, the developers at Game Freak simply iterate upon each element of gameplay, introduce new creatures for players to collect, and let marketing take care of the rest.

As the franchise closes in on twenty years - and prepares to add yet another Nintendo console to its resume - we thought we'd look back; not on the games or creatures that we most treasure, but the ones that keep us up at night.

Here are the 10 Most Disturbing Pokemon Facts.
 
Gothita Sees Dead People

Name: Gothita
Type: Psychic

It's disturbing enough that Gothita, this Pokemon's starting form resembles a baby that "stares at something only it can see," but once it evolves into Gothorita at Level 32, its creep factor gets sent sky high. With hypnosis mastered, the creature "steals people away at night." Whether it steals people away as offerings to the thing "only it can see" is impossible to know.

Once the evolution to Gothitelle is achieved at Level 41, this creature uses its psychic abilities to see the future, specifically the death of their trainer. While useful in combat, having this Pokemon in one's arsenal is just too creepy. You can always look on the bright side: if Gothitelle isn't hypno-kidnapping its trainer, it's probably only because it knows death is imminent.
 

Can't. Stop. Hopping.

Name: Spoink
Type: Psychic

If you're looking for a precocious and spunky critter to keep by your side, then Spoink fits the bill. Sure, it's a little weird that the pig-headed Pokemon uses a giant pink pearl on its head to amplify its psychic abilities, but the way it hops around on the spring it possesses in place of a body? Adorable!

Until you learn that the springing isn't a sign of Spoink's rambunctious attitude, but required to live. That's right; if Spoink stops springing, he stops breathing. Stops doing pretty much anything, really. Try to imagine what kind of paranoia results when death is just a misstep away, and it suddenly becomes easier to understand why Spoink is also a kleptomaniac, ever pursuing a bigger and better pearl.

Cry For Me, Child
Name: Duskull
Type: Ghost

Sure, ghosts are always spooky, and it's no mystery why this Pokemon - styled after the Grim Reaper - puts us on edge. But the single glowing eye sliding back and forth between eye sockets is just the tip of the iceberg where additional eeriness is concerned. Duskull is a nocturnal Pokemon, mostly inhabiting dense forests (obviously), but isn't interested in woodland creatures, only children.

This floating Pokemon is rumored to pursue kids who don't follow the rules. Why? Because it enjoys the sound of them crying. But hey, it's not all creepy; once Duskull evolves into Dusclops, it is capable of swallowing anything into its body cavity, never to be seen again. We'll let you use your imagination.

Delicious Nightmares

Name: Drowzee

Type: Psychic

We don't know if there's something about Psychic type Pokemon that brings out the most troubling in the developers, but Drowzee is yet another hypnotizing critter that makes our skin crawl. The aptly-named Pokemon puts its enemies to sleep, so that it may more easily feast on its dreams. While that certainly places Drowzee under the 'odd' column among the series' more fun-loving Pokemon, it's actually based on the Japanese "baku"; spirits that fed on people's nightmares.

But what it loves most is the dreams of children. We don't know why, and don't want to either. In case Drowzee's powers weren't enough of an invasion of privacy, it also remembers every dream it's consumed, and shares them with those sleeping near them. How many pets can do that?!


Grimer a.k.a. Walking Death


 Name: Grimer

Type: Poison

It's disgusting enough that Grimer spends its time in polluted water, feasting on pollution and sewage to survive, but get this Pokemon moving through the world and it will never be the same. Literally; any time Grimer passes over the grond, its toxic slime (grime?) renders the earth incapable of ever again supporting life. If that wasn't hellish enough, the slime also sprouts new Grimers to continue the catastrophe.

It's not all bad, though. Once Grimer evolves into Muk, it gets bigger, and more poisonous; capable of rendering an entire lake toxic with a single drop, and infecting any human being if it desires. Why was a Pokemon this dangerous and unattractive created in the first place? Who knows. Maybe the developers thought Mother Nature should be as terrorized as actual people.

Parasite Evil
Name: Paras
Type: Bug/Grass

While Paras' symbiotic relationship with the mushrooms on its back isn't exactly normal, it is beneficial for both; Paras feeds the mushrooms with its body, and the fungus provides additional means of defense. Exactly how much control the mushrooms can exert over the Pokemon isn't clear, but odd goes to disturbing when Paras evolves into Parasect.

It's hard to say exactly what change takes place at Level 24, but for some reason, the mushrooms take their chance and merge into a single organism, taking over the Paras in the process. With heightened aggression and a pair of zombified milky eyes, anything cute or endearing about Paras is replaced by a demonic drone known as Parasect.


Murder Balloon

Name: Drifloon
Type: Ghost/Flying

How scary can a Pokemon based on a floating balloon be? Sure, it's got a pair of tiny hands, but what devious use could such a lighthearted creature have for them? According to the Pokedex, they're used to "steal children away," with the Japanese version clarifying that Drifloon is taking children to "the world of the dead." Were the developers given a bonus every time they created a Pokemon that would make parents uncomfortable?

The good news is that Drifloon doesn't remain a purple, harmless-looking balloon with an interest in kidnapping children; at level 28 Drifloon evolves into Drifblim, trading its spindly arms for... four stronger ones. And its eyes turn red. Sleep tight, kiddies.
  
There Will Be Tears

Name: Yamask
Type: Ghost

As proof that not every Pokemon has a complicated or inspired name, we give you Yamask. It's a ghost, holding a mask. We don't mean that this Pokemon is a Ghost type, it is an actual ghost of a human being who has died; the mask it carries is a representation of the one it used to have while living. That bit of character history creeps us out for obvious reasons, but the developers went into even greater depth.

Besides occasionally staring at the mask and breaking into tears, Yamask has an even more sinister side. Since the mask itself carries traces of the Yamask's human identity, someone wearing it will allow the Pokemon to possess them. To what end? Who knows. If trends hold though, we'd put our money on kidnapping children. Once it evolves into Cofagrigus, this Pokemon uses its sarcophagus body to lure in humans and Pokemon, and turn them into zombified mummies.

Geppetto's Nightmare

Name: Banette
Type: Ghost

There's no need to explain why Banette gives us the willies, since the most apt description of this creature is "a doll-like Pokemon that is possessed with pure hatred." You see, Banette wasn't always a Pokemon, but a doll that was driven into being by the hatred felt toward the child that abandoned it. That's already the stuff of nightmares, but the creators went farther, making Banette poke itself with needles to generate energy for its attacks, and even sporting a zipper in place of a mouth.

What makes Banette even more disturbing is that it evolves from Shuppet - a fairly adorable little ball of grey that is drawn to peoples' feelings of envy. We guess it's poetic that evolving lets Shuppet turn that envy into action, but.... a zipper mouth? Do they know kids play these games?

Mommy Issues

Name: Cubone
Type: Ground

From first glance, Cubone is about as cool as a pet could possibly be. Essentially a dinosaur, Cubone walks on its hind legs, swings a bone club, and wears a skull over its face, peeking out from under it like a little kid trying to appear tough for his friends. But in the vast expanse of Pokemon, Cubone might just be the most disturbed of them all. You see, that skull isn't just part of a Halloween costume, or a trinket Cubone discovered while navigating a Looney Tunes desert. It belongs to its mother.

Apparently it wasn't enough for Cubone to simply cry in the night for his lost mother, and a more literal connection was needed. We're not going to ask how Cubone actually acquired the skull of his mother, but things get creepier when it evolves into Marowak. No longer simple ornamentation, the skulls fuses itself to the Pokemon upon evolution, meaning this creature is permanently attached to his mother in a way Norman Bates would envy.






Monday, December 9, 2013

25 Biggest Rip Offs That You’ve Probably Been Tricked Into Buying

(list25) - These days you can’t be too careful. Although everyone knows that emails from Nigeria are most likely scams, you may not consider some of the rip offs a bit closer to home. Here are the 25 biggest rip off that you’ve probably been tricked into buying.

Thursday, November 28, 2013

Happy Hanukkah 2013

KibbyQuesadilla wishes you all a happy Chanukah! (because Christmas is so over rated)



KibbyQuesadilla is not Jewish or Palestinian in ethnic/religious origin. All opinions are my own.

Monday, November 25, 2013

Friday, November 22, 2013

Common White Girl Tag. (KQ)

O la, So today I am going to attempt to do a tag that has been going around the internet er..YouTube for a while. The tag is called "The Common White Girl Tag" I know it's a Common White Girl tag & Considering I is not a white girl I thought it would be fun to do anyway. (And you will get to know more about me.) Moving on...

The Questions

1. What is your favourite Starbucks Drink?
Answer: Honestly what is with the Starbucks related questions in every freaking survey out there seriously give it a rest..

2. How long does it take for you to get ready in the morning?
Answer - Depends. It takes me usually 15-20 minutes to get ready.

3. How many selfies do you take on a daily basis?
Answer: Hardly any. The selfies I do take are for my social media.

4.  How many Instagram pics & followers do you have?
Answer: I don't have an Instagram so I can't tell you.

5. Do you say "lol" or "omg" out loud.
Answer: No.

6. Do you wear the same clothing more than once?
Answer: Yes all the time. I wear my work uniform & my street clothing for three days max until I change into a new outfit. (I don't go out much so I don't feel like I have impress certain people with my clothing choices)

7. Are you racist?
Answer: I'm not a race car driver...

8. How many tweets do you have?
Answer: As of this post, 677. (Follow @KibbyQuesadilla)

9. Instagram Twitter or Tumblr?
Answer: Twitter. Do not have Instagram or a Tumblr.

10. What do you spend most of your time doing?
Answer: Living. Seriously you might want to try it.

11. Who are your favorite YouTubers?
Answer: I used to watch a bunch of people like ShaneDawsonTV, Nigahiga, Fred, Venetian Princess, Lisa Nova, PhilipDeFranco, Winterspringpro, Juicystar07, IJustine, etc. Anyway I like Julieg713 (saw her grace my television once. she is amazing love her) Grav3yardgirl, MakeupbyTiffanyD, Excatholics. That's about it.

12 Are you a shopaholic?
Answer: I like to shop for stuff but I'm not a compulsive buyer.

13. How many time have you watched Mean Girls?
Answer: Only one time.

14. Do you own a lot of clothes?
Answer: I have quite a collection of clothes but not a HUGE amount. I have a lot of buttoned shirts that make up my wardrobe.

15. Do you wear makeup everyday?
Answer: I don't wear liquid makeup at all. If it was socially acceptable I would wear masqara. I have long lashes & they would pop like fire.

16. Do you take photos of your food before you eat it?
Answer: No.

17. What are your average grades in school"
Answer: I am no longer in school of any kind, but when I was in primary they were average. In Secondary they slipped dramatically. Grades are constructs.

18. How do you style your hair?
Answer: Depends. I like it to look presentable. I like to take a flat iron to straighten it cause it just looks awful if I don't do it all.

19. Do you always look presentable?
Answer: I try to be. If I go out I like to look classy & sophisticated.

There you go. My answers to all the questions that were available. I was not tagged by anyone to do this tag. It was all in good fun & not meant to be taken seriously. So if you want to do this tag/survey I tag anyone that's anybody to do it (if you want) Until next post I will see you all soon.



Sunday, November 3, 2013

How to play tic tac toe

Tic Tac Toe (also known as Noughts and Cross) is a simple and fun game that can be played almost anywhere & anytime.

Equipment
Paper and pencil.
Goal
The goal of Tic Tac Toe is to be the first player to get three in a row on a 3x3 grid, or four in a row in a 4x4 grid.

Da Rules:

Prepare for the game by drawing the number symbol; # (3X3 or 4x4 table of squares)  
  
The first person chooses to use either X's or O's. These symbols will be placed on the table, in the attempt to have three of them in a row.
 
The players take turns putting their symbol on the table.

 The first player to have 3 of their symbols in a row, whether it is horizontally, vertically, or diagonally, is the winner.

Other rules:

Playing Tic Tac Toe on a 3x3 Board
X always goes first.
Players alternate placing Xs and Os on the board until either (a) one player has three in a row, horizontally, vertically or diagonally; or (b) all nine squares are filled.
If a player is able to draw three Xs or three Os in a row, that player wins.
If all nine squares are filled and neither player has three in a row, the game is a draw.

Playing Tic Tac Toe on a 4x4 Board
X always goes first.
Players alternate placing Xs and Os on the board until either (a) one player has four in a row, horizontally, vertically or diagonally; or (b) all 16 squares are filled.
If a player is able to draw four Xs or four Os in a row, that player wins.
If all 16 squares are filled and neither player has four in a row, the game is a draw.

Tips & warnings.
The center space is arguably the best one to get first
sitting in an outside middle square can be a bad move if you have a clever opponent.
It's said to be a "cats game" when no one wins.


Other Variants
Tic Tac Toe can be also be played on a 5x5 grid with each player trying to get five in a row.
The game can also be played on larger grids, such as 10x10 or even 20x20. For any grid of 6x6 or larger, I recommend sticking to a goal of getting five in a row. This turns the basic game of Tic Tac Toe into a much more complex game with similarities to Pente.

Soruce
Source2